To heighten the illusion of newness, create a sexy scenario and dress the part — a blonde wig, cowboy hat, pirate eye patch, tall boots, whatever. The next thing you know, he'll be pushing past you to wipe the counter, change the kitty litter, and unload the dishwasher. Make the first move.
Touch each part and say aloud what you like about it — this will help to reinforce your feelings, says Berman. If you need another reason to exercise, consider this: Making up sexy stories, reading romantic literature aloud, or watching scenes from a steamy movie arouses the imagination as well as the libido. The thing is, you like sex — a lot. It also gets you in the mood by reducing stress and boosting your self-esteem. It's extreme, yes, but highly effective. The excitement, even the passion, are MIA. Read the list every morning. But when you're feeling disconnected, your relationship and your sex life suffer. Add a few thrills. Make the mind-body connection. Tease yourself — and him. Play gin rummy, poker, or Scrabble with your partner and let the winner cash in for backrubs, foot massages, or any sexual favor of choice. Chances are, this doesn't happen often enough. To heighten the illusion of newness, create a sexy scenario and dress the part — a blonde wig, cowboy hat, pirate eye patch, tall boots, whatever. How to break the stalemate? You need to feel close to him to be inspired to make love, and he often needs sex to feel close to you, explains Berman. Bedtime Stories Many North Shore couples use fantasy and erotica to get their fires burning. That's because when a woman experiences chronic tension, her body produces higher levels of oxytocin, a chemical that cancels out the effects of the sex hormone testosterone. Tell him how to turn you on. Then ask your partner what he loves about your body, and write it down. Do something daring outside the bedroom and dopamine levels may skyrocket — along with your sex drive. Working out is a great way to boost your sex life. The brain is the biggest sex organ, so why not give it some fresh material? The same is true in the bedroom — especially if you and your partner have been together for a while and sex has become automatic.
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